You can’t do it alone.

This is what resonates the most for me.


You can’t do it alone


No one ever got anything extraordinary done without the knowledge, talent, and support of others. 


You need others and they need you. You’re all in this together. You have to be sensitive to the needs of others, listen, ask questions, develop others, provide support, and ask for help. 


This was the hardest thing for me as the independent person that I am. Being forced to ask for help when I just wanted to do it myself?


Sure, that's impossible. But, it sounds easier than bringing everyone along
with me for the ride. 


Then again, if I had to carry the baby, I really would have been an emotional wreck.


I kept thinking - 


Why can't I just focus a little harder and put some more effort into this and
have success. This has worked for me throughout my life.


I am not used to failure.


But, in the Surrogacy World - going alone - got me no where.


Telling my sobby sad story over and over again was self inflicted torture. 


My own personal ground hog day, where I was forced to ask the world for
pity and help. 


Again, And Again, And Again.


I learned that in Surrogacy World you don't get to hold back. The entire
experience requires that you share of yourself.


Your emotions.


Your thoughts.


Your fears.


We are reminded of this now - every day as we work with other Intended Parents and Surrogates. 


We’re reminded of it not only by the new people who share their stories with us, but also by the fact that we’ve been working collaboratively for years with surrogates to find our own way.


We could never have done what we’ve done without the caring support and involvement of so many other people. The Surrogacy World is a small extraordinary community.


And now - satisfied with my results - 


My fears behind me - 


I have entered the mushy phase.

It’s all about expectations. Greatness doesn’t appear on its own. Somebody expects it.


Okay, so you’re thinking: What in the world does this have to do with me this morning?

I don't know. That's for you to figure out.

For me,  It's about Expecting a Miracle and getting it. The bottom line is that our Surrogate did something great for us.

Now, if you are a new to my story,  it’s was all about expectations. Greatness doesn’t appear on its own. Somebody expects it. For us, our baby didn't happen by accident.

She put her life, and her family on hold so that we could become parents. That is an amazing thing that she did.

So often we slip into our roles and routines – as parent, child, friend or co-worker. And we think others are static entities.

They are great people or maybe simply average, or unpredictable or extremely steady. And if they’re not totally static, then we figure any control of how good they are, lies with them. But, the fact is we have so much more power than that.

We shape possibilities for others. And others shape possibilities for us.

The good parent is relentlessly: challenging, and encouraging, jostling and teaching, coaching, holding feet to the fire, and especially believing some more, and pointing out and celebrating results.

If you followed my story you will know that I was working on my parenting skills the whole time.

Good friends do the same thing.

Great parents, great friends, and great people create a space of possibility. And the last thing they do is give up on their beliefs, faith, and expectations.
After multiple attempts and years of struggle we now have an 8 1/2 month old healthy baby.
And things couldn't be better.