Even good news isn't reassuring.....

Otherwise, called Good News Maybe......

We know the process.

We've been there, done that, and won the prize.

However, there is no smooth sailing easy ride through this process and every answer leads to more questions.

More uncertainty.

More doubt about what direction to take and how to proceed.

We went into the IVF portion of the process with the goal of getting one good healthy embryo.

We sort of got that done. Maybe, Yes/maybe, and no was our embryo report.

To begin with we had 6 eggs of which 4 fertilized.

Of our four embryos that were chugging along one of them stopped chugging.

Now we are down to three little embryos.

Embryo #3 had trisomy 13 and this is better to know today than tomorrow.

This leaves us with two little embryos.

Embryo #2 is a Boy. However, the genetic testing is inconclusive with no results. The embryo quality is 4AA so the odds of it growing and becoming a live baby are 75%. Great odds, but with Embryo #3 have trisomy the genetic test being inconclusive is a concern.

Embryo #1 is a Girl. She is healthy, but has fragmentation and is graded a 3/4BB. This gives her a 60% chance of success.

The plan, at least today's plan, is to thaw the boy and re-test him before transfer. This means that he will be tested, frozen, thawed, and tested again before transfer. We will test his survival skills and make sure that he is up to the task and not a wimpy boy.

Plan A with the expectations/possibilities of having two healthy Grade A embryos was to transfer one into two Surrogates.

Plan B might be to transfer two embryos into one Surrogate and count heads on the other side. Or transfer just the boy, if he passes the health test and wait for the results before scheduling the girls transfer date.

While our odds are good and our expectations have been met, this is never an easy process with easy answers.

Oh, the Joy of Surrogacy.

We have blastocysts.......

On Day 5 we are batting 4 for 4.

We have 4 little blastocysts chugging along.

One is an expanding blastocyst and the others are just behind growing on schedule.

Statistically, only about 25-60% of embryos grow to the day 5 blastocysts stage so once again we are on the high end of the odds line.

Without further testing this would give us around a 60% clinical pregnancy rate and a 35% live birth rate per embryo.

Having the embryos tested in theory would increase our chances of a live birth by at least 20% and reduce our chance of a miscarriage by about 20%.

What do you think that we are going to do?

You can call this IVF and Surrogacy by the numbers.

Another Day Older....

At the end of Day 3 we are another day older and more mature and everyone is still alive and growing.

One embryo is a 8 cell grade "A".

The other 3 embryos are at 6 cells and a Grade "A".

With an A being the highest grade we are growing on pace.

Our four little guys are chugging along, healthy, and growing on pace. That is all that we can ask for at this time.

The real genetic health test is still a few days away and the next bar that they will need to high jump over.
Can they pass their first physical?

Surrogacy By The Numbers

Surrogacy at the early stages is about the numbers.

How many follicles.

How many eggs.

How many mature eggs.

How many fertilized.

How many embryos.

How many embryos are healthy.

Every stage the numbers go down. Day by Day the numbers get lower and you odds go down with them each step of the way.

So much about Surrogacy is managing expectations so that you can stay positive throughout the process.

We beat expectations in the number of eggs. We got 6 when we expected to have 5.

We now have 4 fertilized embryos. That means we have 4 potential babies.

The next stage is to find out how many of them are healthy.

Based on our expectations we are still expecting to have 1 that is healthy and viable.

We expect to have good answers be the end of this week.

Our history with Austin was 6 eggs, 4 mature, 3 fertilized embryos, one healthy child. 

Let's hope for a repeat. 

Surrogacy - Wanted one hardy, healthy, fighting survivor.

Recently, we were asked if we were going to have another child. Have we thought about doing it again?Have you decided to do it again?

My answer was we have not decided how much we are ready to share.

This is a tough choice to make because even when it is easy, it's not easy.

Every stage has new risks to consider and think about.

We went into this knowing that we have a small chance of success and that it may take more than one try to find a healthy embryo to transfer. That's before we even get to the be concerned during the two week wait. Our odds of finding a healthy egg get worse with each month so we need to move quickly if this is going to work.

Going into this the first concern is what if you don't have any healthy embryos? How many times do you try?
What is an acceptable number of attempts? There are variables and issues to think about on another day.

The second concern is what happens if you get a crazy number? What do you do if you have 30 eggs?

As of yesterday, we still have 11 follicles growing. It appears that we have 5 that will be mature on Wednesday when we do the egg retrieval. That means we are squarely focused on the not enough eggs option rather than the overflowing basket option.

Considering if the normal ratios apply that will leave us with 1-2 healthy embryos at best.

That's means that the big question for now is:

Can we find one hardy, healthy, fighting survivor in the mix? That's all we need.

Surrogacy Again...Back into the fire.

Someday we will....Maybe.

Someday we will....Maybe.

Someday is.....Today.

We are walking back into the fire.

Attempting Surrogacy Again.

This brings our lifeless blog back to life. To share another adventure with you.


I was going to wait until I was sure that we had healthy embryos and good news and start sharing the story in November, but we are never assured of good news, even after a positive pregnancy test, and would like to share the story now from the start.

Surrogacy Made me a Grandma

Here are the details.

We've been going back and forth with the do we do it again conversation. For the longest time it was 10-20 percent for and 80-90 percent against.

We are getting older and our eggs are dust. We have a wonderful healthy child. It is easy to say "let's not do it again."

But, the siren call sings, it touches the heart and we move toward it. Unable to resist the call.We resisted for a long time, but our fight ended quickly and quietly.

Our hesitation and doubt changed when my otherwise healthy and active Dad at 71 years old had a stroke. He is healthy and stable, but as his life changed in a new direction so did ours.

You can't control life. No matter how much you try.

Sometimes, Life comes at you and you accept it and take the course that opens to you without question.

For us, that means doing Surrogacy Again....Walking through Fire to have another child or children.

We have chosen to work with Dr. Kumar with Fertility and Surgical Associates of California.

We have started the process already. We have 11 follicles all growing well and expect to have the retrieval the middle of next week.

We will PGD the embryos for health and then start looking to match with a Surrogate.

The plan is to move fast with a December transfer. This way if it doesn't work we can do another round of IVF before our eggs disappear for good. The timer is ticking and we have to move quickly.

Another part of the plan is to revive the tale of two Surrogates and we will work with two surrogates at the same time if we have two embryos. We would transfer one embryo into each Surrogate.

Overall, it's exciting and nerve wracking times. Let the roller coaster begin.

Surrogacy Together - Blogging For Surrogacy Campaign

Welcome Back!

Once again I am going to be part of the blogging world. 

This Summer we will be traveling the United States and will be sharing what Surrogacy means to me and asking them what Surrogacy means to them.

Over the last few years being involved with the Surrogacy community has taken us internationally to Europe, Mexico, and Australia. This Summer we are going to San Diego, Denver, Seattle, Boston, Charlotte, New York, Chicago, and Minnesota

We also have many new friends that will be joining us in London and August 24th, 2013 we are excited to be honoring over 100 Surrogates at the Salute to Surrogacy Celebration in San Diego, California.

We will be keeping you updated with blog posts here and guests blog posts that we will be making on other blogs focused on the Surrogacy community.

Surrogacy Together - Blogging For Surrogacy:

Over the next 75 days leading up to the Salute to Surrogacy Celebration. We are going to be blogging about Surrogacy on a regular/daily basis. 

We are asking other people to join us on the Surrogacy Together Blogging for Surrogacy project. The details are simple:

We are making guest posts on other people's blogs and on the Surrogacy Together website. Let use know if you would like us to make a guest post
on your blog.

The first three Guest posts this will be on the blogs:
A Belly for me, A Baby for you. 
All Things Surrogacy
Find A Surrogate

The first topic will be "What does Surrogacy Mean to You?"

Everyone is welcome to join the project by writing a new post about Surrogacy on their own blog or by sharing a post on their website about Surrogacy that they have already completed. You are encouraged, but not required to submit more than one post. 

We will have a main page on the Surrogacy Together website that will promote all of the blog posts and we will update the list with new posts daily.

To submit a post, we need the following information sent to Jon@SurrogacyTogether.com
Website Name
The Post Title
The Post Permalink
The post top three topics
Your Email
You can also tweet in support of Surrogacy families and use the hashtag #SurrogacyTogether. 

Please encourage all your friends to participate! Everyone from the Surrogacy Community is encouraged to contribute to the conversation.